Anne Schmidt
Me after two anal orgasms
Novel 2023 | Publishing House Edition 502 | Berlin
Me after two anal orgasms
2023
Novel
Verlag Edition 502 Berlin
ISBN 978-3-9825541-9-1
Language: German
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During the time I was writing this book, my psychologist classified my condition, which I thought was great love, as mania and sent me to the emergency room for appropriate medication. In the treatment room, I was completely convinced with my handwritten, illustrated, pornographic novel as the fulfillment of meaning in life. My enthusiasm for writing was so impressive that the two attending physicians momentarily forgot my diagnosis and believed me. Their eyes flashed with a pang of envy over me being the one who managed to answer the burning question, “And why all this?“ without batting an eye: write a romance novel. Therefore.
2023
Language: German
Interview with Frederike Maas, literary scholar, ETH, Zurich
F: And then you took it from him - that's how the novel came about?
A: I sat in bed and tried to watch an 8mm Annie Ernaux film, but I couldn't. I was so in love, I could only think about the person I was in love with. I was so in love, all I could do was think about the person I was in love with. It was very difficult for me to do my job, make plans, have ideas, watch movies; opening my laptop was unimaginable. Soppy love songs on endless loop sometimes went. I was so in love that I realized the justification of the road rules. I was far enough addicted to idiocy to run into cars. My concentration span was barely enough to remember the meaning of "red" correctly. In bed, I was safe.
The only thing that went was writing. Probably because I wanted to write to him all the time. Walking around aimlessly, grinning beatifically at strangers, and writing. Then I took a red notebook my aunt had given me and started. I thought: Until I see this person next time, I will write this love novel about us.
F: So you handwrote the book first. How many editing steps are there between this first, handwritten version (...)
Excerpt from the novel
2023
Language: German
In: Dis/claim Magazine
Thank you very much that so many of you came to my reading. Thank you Sabine that I may read here. I read from my novel Me after two anal orgasms. As you can see I have painted a beautiful cover. The ISBN is printed on the back. And then there's so reviews of Hannah Arendt in the New York Times "Breath-taking". Michelle Obama says "My favorite love story." The novel is 250 pages, all of which I wrote in a week, which I like to brag about. It has drawings in it like this: On K. Very good!
My nomination for the Vordemberge-Gildeward scholarship and participation in the exhibition at the mumok in Vienna was followed by a depressive hole. I lay around looking at the wall while the great futility of art and especially the unwon 60,000 francs prize money hovered over me. When, in addition, my gallery Vinvin sold nothing at the Vienna Contemporary, I resolutely quit.
From then on, my new purpose in life was uninhibited sex. My dating profile had over 3,000 likes in no time. A few dates later, I fell hopelessly in love with a fully-employed man who was on a business trip. I introduced him to my friends at the end of the week with the words "he's saving the world," (...)
